The whole truth about body shaming and body positivity: notes of a thinner

About body sham­ing and body pos­i­tiv­i­ty, the impact of overeat­ing on the psy­che and whether it is worth it to fall in love with any­one — read in the new issue of Notes of a Lost Woman, a diary of our read­er, in which she talks about her suc­cess­ful expe­ri­ence of los­ing weight.

slimming photo notes



Overeating and the psyche

Overeat­ing leaves an imprint on our psy­che for years, I am con­vinced of this. He imposed on mine, on those who were over­weight and whom I per­son­al­ly know for many years, he imposed. Per­haps there are those whose weight is exces­sive, but with their self-esteem and self-aware­ness, every­thing is fine. At least that’s what they say and most like­ly they’re not lying. All this “love your­self any”, “a good per­son should be many”, “men don’t throw them­selves at bones” always hurt me, I felt that this was not so. For the inner me, it was­n’t like that. I could­n’t love myself. Some­times I was pleased with myself — a lot of things revolved around my life. But this weight always seemed to cast a shad­ow on my best achieve­ments. For exam­ple, when I was paint­ing, because offi­cial­ly I am a painter! There were suc­cess­ful paint­ings, I even found buy­ers, received prizes at com­pe­ti­tions. I was proud of myself, but this shad­ow …

Love yourself any?

If body pos­i­tiv­i­ty is so wide­spread and there are so many peo­ple who love their weight and self-con­fi­dent fat peo­ple, then why is there such a demand for fash­ion design­ers explain­ing what types of clothes are thin? Why waist and bel­ly slim­ming corsets? Well, okay, let’s say there are those who are over­weight and sat­is­fied with them­selves, and they are not inter­est­ed in clothes that make them slim­mer. And these clothes are made for those who lack the strength to lose weight, but they would like to hide their excess weight. And it turns out that despite the mil­i­tant body-pos­i­tive and calls to love your­self, every­one knows that this is not easy, and for some it is almost impos­si­ble, and in order to some­how raise the self-esteem of the full, they offer them clothes that hide their weight? Love your­self and here are clothes that will hide what you are offered to love in your­self! ..

body shaming photo


I am sure that here one must be espe­cial­ly care­ful and del­i­cate. Prob­a­bly, in a soci­ety where there is such a crit­i­cal atti­tude towards the over­weight, it is impos­si­ble to open­ly encour­age over­weight and very over­weight peo­ple to lose weight.

  • Mod­ern soci­ety real­ly needs tol­er­ance for oth­ers, loy­al­ty to those who are dif­fer­ent, non-stan­dard.
  • You can not start “shock ther­a­py” open­ly.
  • It is unac­cept­able, call­ing for weight loss, to appeal to the most vile sides of the soul of those who have a nor­mal weight. After all, hatred for the “fat” rais­es the low­est waves in a per­son, and this “attack them” begins, which, of course, should not be allowed.
  • It seems that these cun­ning slo­gans “Love your­self any” are not need­ed either.
  • And absolute­ly you can’t shake the slo­gan: “Hate your­self fat.” All this needs a bal­ance.

Bodyshaming is not allowed!

I do not want any­one who is over­weight, espe­cial­ly with a large one, to expe­ri­ence such dis­com­fort as I did. And I have no firm under­stand­ing of how to rea­son­ably and care­ful­ly help peo­ple recon­sid­er their eat­ing habits and at the same time to be effec­tive. And How DO NOT INJURE their feel­ings, how not to tram­ple them down and cru­ci­fy them. Lord, after all, and so to the full and fat is always a con­temp­tu­ous-con­demn­ing atti­tude. It hurts me even now. And for that self. And for those who are. Espe­cial­ly for those who have health prob­lems and their weight is far from emp­ty and worth­less glut­tony, as it was with me.

One thing I know for sure: blam­ing (blame) and sham­ing (to shame) ABSOLUTELY unac­cept­able in any con­text, under any cir­cum­stances, ever!

In gen­er­al, any advice should come only from a doc­tor, and in the most cor­rect form. And not “what are you, moth­er, got pissed off?”

  • Feel free to talk about your­self and your weight loss if asked.
  • You can unob­tru­sive­ly men­tion that you were over­weight, but you lost weight (if you received a com­pli­ment about your har­mo­ny from an over­weight per­son).
  • You have to wait if the per­son asks you exact­ly how you did it.

What to do in this case with loved ones whose weight has become a threat to their health? I don’t have an answer here. She has bit­ter years behind her, when her hus­band and rel­a­tives tried to rea­son with me in var­i­ous ways.

slimming photo notes


If we are talk­ing about glut­tons, then most like­ly we should appeal to health. After all, we are essen­tial­ly rap­ing our body with food. And it can’t run away. Because when it runs away, it will take us, the rapists, with it. Reliev­ing stress with food, we, as we think and feel, save our psy­che from over­load. But the body holds a grudge and sud­den­ly brings down on us a bunch of phys­i­cal prob­lems. Skin­ny peo­ple get sick too, yes. Some. But the fat ones will get sick ALWAYS. Com­fort­ing our­selves with food, we lay much more seri­ous prob­lems in the future. Will we freak out when the pres­sure’s run­ning high? Yep, we will. And when will the ves­sels be 10 years old­er than us? Yeah. When will your legs start hurt­ing? And when will short­ness of breath appear? When will heart prob­lems start? After all, even papil­lo­mas grow most­ly full! They seem to need fat under the skin. It is nec­es­sary to cry out for health and call for it, tak­ing care that these cries do not turn into a witch hunt and cries of “Atu” — this is very impor­tant.

CONTINUATION: “The main moti­va­tion for los­ing weight is health”

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