About body shaming and body positivity, the impact of overeating on the psyche and whether it is worth it to fall in love with anyone — read in the new issue of Notes of a Lost Woman, a diary of our reader, in which she talks about her successful experience of losing weight.
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IN THIS PART:
Overeating and the psyche
Overeating leaves an imprint on our psyche for years, I am convinced of this. He imposed on mine, on those who were overweight and whom I personally know for many years, he imposed. Perhaps there are those whose weight is excessive, but with their self-esteem and self-awareness, everything is fine. At least that’s what they say and most likely they’re not lying. All this “love yourself any”, “a good person should be many”, “men don’t throw themselves at bones” always hurt me, I felt that this was not so. For the inner me, it wasn’t like that. I couldn’t love myself. Sometimes I was pleased with myself — a lot of things revolved around my life. But this weight always seemed to cast a shadow on my best achievements. For example, when I was painting, because officially I am a painter! There were successful paintings, I even found buyers, received prizes at competitions. I was proud of myself, but this shadow …
Love yourself any?
If body positivity is so widespread and there are so many people who love their weight and self-confident fat people, then why is there such a demand for fashion designers explaining what types of clothes are thin? Why waist and belly slimming corsets? Well, okay, let’s say there are those who are overweight and satisfied with themselves, and they are not interested in clothes that make them slimmer. And these clothes are made for those who lack the strength to lose weight, but they would like to hide their excess weight. And it turns out that despite the militant body-positive and calls to love yourself, everyone knows that this is not easy, and for some it is almost impossible, and in order to somehow raise the self-esteem of the full, they offer them clothes that hide their weight? Love yourself and here are clothes that will hide what you are offered to love in yourself! ..
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I am sure that here one must be especially careful and delicate. Probably, in a society where there is such a critical attitude towards the overweight, it is impossible to openly encourage overweight and very overweight people to lose weight.
- Modern society really needs tolerance for others, loyalty to those who are different, non-standard.
- You can not start “shock therapy” openly.
- It is unacceptable, calling for weight loss, to appeal to the most vile sides of the soul of those who have a normal weight. After all, hatred for the “fat” raises the lowest waves in a person, and this “attack them” begins, which, of course, should not be allowed.
- It seems that these cunning slogans “Love yourself any” are not needed either.
- And absolutely you can’t shake the slogan: “Hate yourself fat.” All this needs a balance.
Bodyshaming is not allowed!
I do not want anyone who is overweight, especially with a large one, to experience such discomfort as I did. And I have no firm understanding of how to reasonably and carefully help people reconsider their eating habits and at the same time to be effective. And How DO NOT INJURE their feelings, how not to trample them down and crucify them. Lord, after all, and so to the full and fat is always a contemptuous-condemning attitude. It hurts me even now. And for that self. And for those who are. Especially for those who have health problems and their weight is far from empty and worthless gluttony, as it was with me.
One thing I know for sure: blaming (blame) and shaming (to shame) ABSOLUTELY unacceptable in any context, under any circumstances, ever!
In general, any advice should come only from a doctor, and in the most correct form. And not “what are you, mother, got pissed off?”
- Feel free to talk about yourself and your weight loss if asked.
- You can unobtrusively mention that you were overweight, but you lost weight (if you received a compliment about your harmony from an overweight person).
- You have to wait if the person asks you exactly how you did it.
What to do in this case with loved ones whose weight has become a threat to their health? I don’t have an answer here. She has bitter years behind her, when her husband and relatives tried to reason with me in various ways.
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If we are talking about gluttons, then most likely we should appeal to health. After all, we are essentially raping our body with food. And it can’t run away. Because when it runs away, it will take us, the rapists, with it. Relieving stress with food, we, as we think and feel, save our psyche from overload. But the body holds a grudge and suddenly brings down on us a bunch of physical problems. Skinny people get sick too, yes. Some. But the fat ones will get sick ALWAYS. Comforting ourselves with food, we lay much more serious problems in the future. Will we freak out when the pressure’s running high? Yep, we will. And when will the vessels be 10 years older than us? Yeah. When will your legs start hurting? And when will shortness of breath appear? When will heart problems start? After all, even papillomas grow mostly full! They seem to need fat under the skin. It is necessary to cry out for health and call for it, taking care that these cries do not turn into a witch hunt and cries of “Atu” — this is very important.
CONTINUATION: “The main motivation for losing weight is health”
